You Had Me at Hello...Michael

You see, it had all the makings of a nostalgia camp classic. Reinvented for the modern-day CGI-craving, short-attention-span carrying teenage idiot set, but packed with enough history and wink-wink tongue-in-cheek shout outs to the 30-somethings...and you would have had magic. Instead you had crap on a plate. S.H.I.T. Shit.
Knight Rider Sucked. Hard.

Hot girl? Check.
New version of KITT? Check.
Decent enough guy to play the new Michael Knight? ahhhh....check.
Script? Nope.
Proper musical tribute with Knight Rider song? Nope.
Commercial cut-aways 80's Knight Rider Style? Nada.
Val Kilmer at KITT? Brutal.

Here is all I am trying to say: I am OK with the butchering of the theme song. It felt like Moby and the Chemical Brothers bailed out at the last minute and Moby's retarded cousin Squeaky took over.
I wasn't expecting much from the plot -- in fact I was hoping it would be classic Knight Rider cheesy, and it was. But I did want those classic Knight Rider commercial breakaways where Kitt takes off into the sunset and the theme music takes us out. And I did want maybe a little better continuity between new Michael Knight and the old...It turns out Michael Knight left his family behind to come Michael Knight -- he had a duty, and duty calls. I wonder if old Michael Knight was thinking about them when he was making out with all those classic 80's women - all in the name of crime fighting of course.
Well anyway, it turns out he had a family and now 25 years later the new KITT is programmed to look for Michael's son, and he finds him, and he doesn't know about his dad or what he did or who he was until later. Then they finally meet:

HASSELHIZZY: My name is Michael. Michael Knight. I am your father.

NEW GUY: My name is Mike. I know.

wow -- I waited 20 years for that? That was pretty much the extent of the conversation then Hasselhoff leaves to collect his $50,000 for the day and the kid asks if he'll ever see his old man again. The Hoff says, "I hope so".

Final scene: Michael getting briefed on his next mission, setting up a TV show for the fall. The whole cast falls into place as his support staff...it's all there. 2 hours of crap for this setup. Then I turn to Lauren and say..."If they are in a truck and Michael rolls off the back onto the highway and the original theme music plays...I am in."

Nope, the back opens up and he is dropped onto a runway from a big plane and there is no music, just a cut to credits. What a piece of shit waste of time that was.